Choosing a senior living community is a major decision.
A community may look beautiful during a scheduled tour. The lobby may be impressive, the
dining room may look inviting, and the staff member conducting the tour may be warm and
welcoming.
But a senior living community is more than its appearance.
The more important question is:
“What will everyday life actually be like for my loved one?”
A thoughtful tour gives families an opportunity to look beyond the décor and learn about care,
staffing, safety, activities, costs, and how the community operates.
At GEMSI Senior Living Advisors, we encourage families to tour more than one community
whenever possible and compare what they learn.
Here are 25 questions to take with you
● Independent living?
● Assisted living?
● Memory care?
● Respite care?
● Different levels of assistance?
Questions to consider:
● Who performs the assessment?
● When is it performed?
● Is the family involved?
● Is the resident reassessed after moving in?
● How often are care needs reviewed?
This is one of the most important questions.
Your loved one’s needs may change over time.
Ask:
“If my parent needs more assistance six months from now, what happens?”
Also ask how increased care affects the monthly cost.
Don’t stop at the advertised monthly rate.
Ask:
● What is included?
● What costs extra?
● Is care tiered?
● Is there an à la carte fee structure?
● Are medication services additional?
● Are there additional charges for incontinence assistance?
Request a current fee schedule whenever possible.
Ask specifically about:
● Meals
● Housekeeping
● Laundry
● Utilities
● Activities
● Transportation
● Emergency response
● Basic care services
Understanding what is included allows you to compare communities accurately
Ask about staffing throughout the day and night.
Questions include:
● How many caregivers are typically working?
● Is staffing different overnight?
● Is there a nurse on-site?
● Is there an on-call nurse?
● What happens when an employee calls out?
You don’t necessarily need a specific staffing ratio to ask an important question:
“How do you ensure residents receive the assistance they need during every shift?”
Staff turnover can affect continuity.
Ask about:
● Executive leadership
● Wellness/care leadership
● Memory care leadership
● Caregiver tenure
A community with experienced leadership and consistent staff may offer greater continuity.
Ask what happens if your loved one:
● Falls
● Becomes ill
● Has a change in mental status
● Needs emergency medical attention
Also ask how the family is notified.
Ask:
“How will I know how my loved one is doing?”
Find out whether the community uses:
● Phone calls
● Family portals
● Email
● Care conferences
● Written updates
● Scheduled meetings
Good communication can make the transition much easier for families.
This question can reveal more than a brochure.
Ask the staff member to walk you through:
“What does a typical day look like for a resident here?”
Ask about:
● Wake-up
● Breakfast
● Activities
● Meals
● Rest periods
● Exercise
● Socialization
● Evening routines
● Bedtime
Activities should be more than entertainment.
Ask whether activities are designed around residents’:
● Physical abilities
● Cognitive abilities
● Interests
● Cultural backgrounds
● Social preferences
If possible, ask to see the current activity calendar.
Food is a major part of quality of life.
Ask:
● How many meals are provided?
● Are snacks available?
● Can residents choose meals?
● Can dietary restrictions be accommodated?
● How are special diets handled?
● Can residents eat in their rooms?
If possible, eat a meal there.
Even if your loved one does not currently have dementia, this question can be valuable.
Ask how the community responds to:
● Wandering
● Agitation
● Repetitive behaviors
● Sundowning
● Resistance to care
● Changes in cognition
Look for answers that demonstrate patience, individualized care, and appropriate safety
practices.
Ask about:
● Emergency response systems
● Fall prevention
● Bathroom safety
● Call systems
● Secured memory care areas
● Emergency preparedness
Ask what personal items are allowed.
Familiar furniture, photographs, artwork, and personal belongings can help make a new
residence feel more like home.
Ask whether transportation is available for:
● Medical appointments
● Shopping
● Community outings
● Religious services
● Personal appointments
Also ask whether there is an additional transportation charge.
Ask:
● Who manages medications?
● How are medications stored?
● How are medication changes communicated?
● What happens when a physician changes a prescription?
Medication management should be clearly explained before move-in.
Ask:
“What happens to their apartment or room if they are hospitalized?”
Also ask:
● Is rent still charged?
● How is the family notified?
● What happens when the resident returns?
● Is there a transition process?
This is an uncomfortable but extremely important question.
Ask what circumstances could require a resident to move to another setting.
Understanding this before admission can prevent surprises later.
Ask about:
● Deposits
● Community fees
● Assessment fees
● Apartment preparation fees
● Administrative fees
● First month’s rent
● Additional care fees
Ask for the information in writing.
Ask whether monthly costs can increase.
If so:
“How are families notified, and how frequently do rates typically change?”
Some communities may have appropriate opportunities for families to learn about residents’ experiences.
Pay attention to what people say when staff members aren’t standing directly beside them.
A scheduled tour is useful—but an unscheduled visit may provide a different perspective.
Ask whether families are welcome to visit at different times.
This is an excellent question because it allows the community to explain its own strengths.
Then ask yourself:
“Does that difference matter to my loved one?”
Before leaving, ask:
● Who is my contact?
● What documents are needed?
● What is the next step?
● How long does the admission process take?
● Is there anything else you need from us?
Not everything you need to know will be answered verbally.
While touring, observe:
The Residents
Do residents appear:
● Engaged?
● Comfortable?
● Clean and appropriately dressed?
● Social?
● Isolated?
● Supported?
The Staff
Do staff members:
● Greet residents by name?
● Speak respectfully?
● Appear rushed?
● Interact warmly?
The Environment
Look for:
● Cleanliness
● Odors
● Noise
● Maintenance
● Safety
● Lighting
● Outdoor access
Trust your observations—but don’t make a decision based on one impression alone.
After each tour, rate the community on:
Location ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐
Care ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐
Staffing ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐
Safety ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐
Activities ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐
Dining ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐
Environment ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐
Family communication ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐
Cost ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐
Overall fit ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐
The goal isn’t necessarily to find the community with the highest score.
It’s to identify the community that appears to be the best overall fit for your loved one.
Families don’t have to evaluate dozens of communities alone.
GEMSI Senior Living Advisors helps families understand their options, identify communities that
may fit their needs, coordinate tours, compare information, and navigate the next steps.
The right community isn’t necessarily the one with the most impressive lobby.
It’s the one where your loved one can be safe, supported, respected, and comfortable
We begin by getting to know the individual, their needs, preferences, circumstances, and priorities.
We're here to help.
